The Department of Removed Characters
by SlasherrGirl
Summary: After learning she won't be on the show next season, Ashley Seaver finds out where characters go after leaving the show.


Here's another oneshot for you...It's kinda cracky but I hope you like it XD

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><p>Ashley looked up from her couch and saw a woman with short black hair and a lime green business suit staring back at her.<p>

"Hi, this is the home of Ashley Seaver right?"

"Um…Yeah, " she replied blankly

"Oh thank goodness, a minute ago I accidentally landed in Reid's house. He saw me and got quite the scare," She laughed "Of course we wouldn't get rid of him, we'd lose the fangirl demographic!"

"Quick question….Who're you and why are you in my house?"

"Sorry, sorry. I always forget to introduce myself. I'm Lorraine I'm from the Removed Character Department, I'm here to take you there,"

"Wait, _What?_"

"Ashley dear, you're not coming back next season, so you're coming with me."

"But the fans were starting to get used to me!" she argued

"I know, I know. Shit happens. Come on grab my hand," Lorraine held it out

With a heavy heart, Ashley grabbed her hand, and closed her eyes. When she opened them she looked around. There were a bunch of colorful houses with titles on them; though they were too small to read. She saw an electrified fence with barb wire at the top.

"Why's that area fenced off?"

"Oh that's the Cancelled Show Department. The fence is a safety precaution; anyway you might've noticed it's not just removed characters from Criminal Minds. That yellow one's CSI, the green one's NCIS…."

"What's the giant purple one?" Ashley asked.

"Oh that's Doctor Who. Believe me that one's always expanding what with the regenerating and the different companions. Oh that reminds me!" she dug into her lemon colored bag and pulled out some forms.

"These are temporary returning forms. Basically if you work part time for us, you have a chance to return for one or two episodes. Of course it's never completely guaranteed… but there have been cases where it happened,"

"Oi Lorraine!" shouted a redhead girl carrying coffee heading over to them.

"Hello Donna," Lorraine said dryly

"I've got a bone to pick with you about those forms. I signed up for the job and I came back for two episodes but I barely did anything aside from not turning into the Master!"

"Well it's in your contract, no guarantees you're going to do much!"

"So let me get this straight. I have to get coffee for these guys; even if it's four o'clock in the morning without any guarantees I'm going to do anything? Blondie, I don't know who you are but don't sign up. It's permanent and turns out there's actually a chance you can come back without signing up, at least that's what Martha lea-" Lorraine put her hand over her mouth. "Don't you have coffee to deliver?"

Donna glared, muttered something that sounded similar to tossing and walked off.

"I take it you're not going to want to sign up are you?"

Ashley shook her head.

"Right…now I should take you to your new home," Lorraine led Ashley to a decently sized blue house. She opened the door to a living room. There were two older men playing chess with a woman watching them, a blonde woman and two brunettes playing poker, Emily was sitting on the couch reading Harry Potter, she looked up.

"Oh hey Ashley, they ditch you too?"

She nodded.

Lorraine smiled. "Well Seaver, you've obviously met Emily, JJ -you met her briefly right?- is upstairs with her husband and son, that's Jane Hanratty watching Jason Gideon playing chess with Frank Breitkopf, Elle Greenaway, Jordan Todd and Haley Hotchner playing poker…"

"Forgetting somebody?" asked a guy coming out of the kitchen with a bowl of cheese doodles

"Oh right, sorry. That's George Foyet,"

"Isn't he the unsub that killed…"

"Eh it's all good here. Once you're off the show you tend to forgive and forget," said Hayley, grabbing a few cheese doodles "I mean,see Frank and Gideon? They were worst enemies and look at them, playing chess like old friends," JJ walked down the stairs.

"Finally got Henry to get to sleep!" She looked and saw Ashley "They're being relentless with the firing this season aren't they? Honestly the show's going to look so sexist…."

"So do any of you miss being on the show?" asked Ashley, wondering how it was like not being there.

"Not really, I mean sure you miss the team but it's not so bad, no unsubs, no paperwork," said Elle

"No Strauss!" added JJ

"Amen to that!" every former member of the BAU chorused

"It's actually pretty sweet living here, " said Emily. Lorraine grinned, happy that this one wouldn't be as mad as Elle had been, even though she'd had less time on the show.

"Oh by the way JJ go get Will and Henry. They're bringing you and Emily back,"

"YES!" the two shouted and highfived

"WILL GET HENRY, WE'RE BACK ON THE SHOW!" shouted JJ, Will was down there with Henry in his arms in ten seconds flat. Without even a goodbye to anyone, the four were gone with Lorraine

"So much for not minding being here," muttered Seaver, slumping onto the couch next to Foyet.

"Life sucks then you die, Cheese doodle?" he asked holding out the bowl,

Ashley shrugged and grabbed one, popping it into her mouth.

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><p>Thoughts? Criticism? Should I do some more? Aren't Cheese Doodles delicious?<p>

For those you who don't know, Donna is from Doctor Who. I just felt like putting her in here to show the whole multiple TV shows things.


End file.
